Fantasy Football Files - 2025/26 - Gameweek 14 - 'Tar-Bucks'

FPL maestro Khurram (K) was my gameweek 14 opponent. He was starting to get his season in rhythm and was climbing the table. It is funny how the fixtures have drawn out for me this season as I played the Baillie brothers (Darren & Michael back-to-back earlier in the campaign and now I was playing best friends K and Muji back-to-back. Clearly the FPL Gods had it in for me.

I made just one transfer. I looked at my squad and as Sunderland travelled to Liverpool that meant I was benching both my players from the Black Cats. Therefore, with Marcos Senesi out suspended I wanted another midfielder who I knew would start so I sold Josh King and got Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall back into my side. As usual my captaincy was with Erling Haaland. Khurram also just used his free transfer and sold the injured Ismaila Sarr for Bruno Fernandes, he too captained the big Norwegian.

The midweek action started on Tuesday evening with three matches. Antoine Semenyo who Khurram and I both owned returned for Bournemouth’s home game against Everton, and he had an early shot saved. As my opponent had James Tarkowski, I desperately needed the Cherries to find the net. Eli Kroupi Jr. thought he had given the home side the lead only for it to be ruled out for an offside. In the second period Semenyo had another effort saved before Jack Grealish’s deflected shot won the game for the Toffees. As if it was not bad enough David Moyes’ men kept a clean sheet, Tarkowski was not amongst the bonus points whilst it was goalless. After the goal however, he moved into the top three in the bonus points system and then with his defensive contributions he amassed a huge 10 points, I was livid. Iliman Ndiaye at least did not return but realistically the damage had been done.

Fulham and Manchester City had an amazing battle at Craven Cottage. Haaland hit the inside of the post before scoring a thumping strike from a ball by Jeremy Doku. Haaland then turned provider as he slipped a ball through for Tijani Reijnders whose clever finish made it 2-0. It was to get even better for City as after a corner was not cleared properly, Phil Foden’s rocket flew into the top corner. Foden is firing now since I sold him but I grew impatient. Emile Smith Rowe’s brilliant header made it 3-1 before the break. Pep Guardiola’s men added two more goals quickly after the interval. Foden bagged a brace after a Doku pass flicked off Haaland and then Doku looked to have made it 5 but the ball took a deflection off Sander Berge. You would have thought it would have been over after that only for Alex Iwobi to score a well-placed goal. Then another Nigerian Samuel Chukwueze scored a fabulous goal, then another which was deflected in to make it 5-4. An outrageously tense ending saw Josko Gvardiol having to clear off the line otherwise the Cottagers would have made a comeback on par with Newcastle coming from four-down against Arsenal in 2011.

Newcastle and Tottenham finished all square due to a Cristian Romero goal right at the death. In a crazy last 20-odd minutes Bruno Guimaraes opened the scoring. The ball came off Nick Woltemade who I was up against but at first, he was not credited with an assist, unfortunately later he was given it. Romero levelled with a header from a Mohammed Kudus cross, Khurram luckily had left Kudus on his bench. Anthony Gordon’s penalty restored the Magpies’ lead before the Romero overhead kick salvaged a point; I say kick it came off his shin. A drunk person would have reacted quicker than to the goal than Aaron Ramsdale and Dan Burn did. Micky van de Ven was benched so after trying to avoid it I was going to get Nordi Mukiele’s points anyway. Tuesday ended with me trailing by 7, 50-43.  

On Wednesday, I had some expectation that Brentford may be able to get something at the Emirates Stadium only for Keith Andrews to rest some of his main XI. Arsenal made a couple of changes too, so Jurrien Timber did not start which effected Khurram. The Gunners were to win 2-0 and David Raya’s clean sheet helped my opponent further. Igor Thiago did come on to no avail obviously. There was different fortune for my goalkeeper as Burnley were beaten 1-0 at home by Crystal Palace, so Martin Dubravka did not return. The more welcome news was that the winning goal was scored by Daniel Munoz, the caveat was that Khurram had him also. Another player from the Eagles we both owned was Jean Philippe-Mateta and he had two decent chances to find the net. The second chance was made by Munoz so it would have been a dream combination.

In the latter Wednesday games, Leeds shocked many as they beat Chelsea 3-1. When I heard Leeds’ first came from a corner, I hoped it was Joe Rodon, only to find out it was Jaka Bijol. Khurram had Enzo Fernandez and he blanked. Arne Slot benched Mo Salah again and I had originally thought of captaining him. The contest ended as a draw thanks to an own goal by Mukiele, I did not want his points regardless but thanks to that he got zero points, nevertheless. Florian Wirtz’s shot was going wide, so it helped the Reds massively. Liverpool had looked set for another defeat when Chemsdine Talbi’s shot went in off Virgil van Dijk who was caught twerking once again, ‘Notting Hill carnival is not until August 2026 Virg mate’. Salah came on in the second period and you could say he was a little unlucky not to return, however as he did not Khurram had won and he still had Bruno Fernandes to play.

Manchester United and West Ham drew 1-1 on Thursday as Fernandes blanked, so I was to lose by 14 points, 79-65. Annoying once again but when Doku’s great performance was neutralised by Tarkowski, I was forlorn and knew what was coming sadly. I will try and avenge my death against his best mate Muji next time out.  

@DubulDee