Fantasy Football Files - 2025/26 - Gameweek 5 - 'Wirtz Case Scenario'

My latest chance to kickstart my diabolical season came against another of my longtime friends Gary. Usually as he was not bashful to take a risk, he sometimes would not accumulate many points in certain gameweeks. This time around however he had an 100% record after 4 games and if results went his way, then he could even go top of the table. I was fodder for everyone currently anyway, but this was not the time to be coming up against him.

As I continue to resist using my wildcard for now despite my freefall, I used my free transfer to bring in Antoine Semenyo for Brennan Johnson. As I previously pointed out, Johnson’s minutes will decrease now Xavi Simons is at Tottenham, so I needed to have a player that I know will always start. Semenyo was the most transferred in player this week. Although I made the change, Newcastle are good defensively so there was a chance that there may not be an immediate return, however it will surely pay mass long-term dividends. Gary’s change was to sell Diogo Dalot for Maxence Lacroix. We both looked to the Merseyside Derby when considering our captains. He picked Cody Gakpo, who I also had whereas I went for Mo Salah who he did not have, so this was going to be interesting. Salah like so many times before was the most captained player.

Indeed, it was the Merseyside Derby which kicked off the gameweek 5 action. Florian Wirtz, who we both owned was only on the bench. Liverpool produced their best first half of the Premier League season thus far as they went 2-0 ahead. The first goal came from a beautiful assist by Salah, as his dinked ball found Ryan Gravenberch whose controlled finish complimented the creativity. The Reds added a second when Gravenberch’s fine pass was converted by Hugo Ekitike. Ekitike (£8.7m) is looking like a bargain right now already getting his 3^rd league goal. The second period was nothing like the first as Everton were much improved and pulled a goal back through Idrissa Gueye. Arne Slot’s men were to hold on to maintain their 100% record. Gakpo’s blank was a bigger blow for Gary but as Salah only assisted, I had a feeling I needed a bit more from the ‘Egyptian King’. Wirtz came on in the second half and got booked so got a big fat zero.

In the 3pm’s Brighton and Tottenham drew 2-2 at the Amex Stadium. Gary and I had Micky van de Ven so there was no return there, the game was still fruitful for my opponent though. Spurs’ first equaliser was scored by Richarlison and set up by Mohammed Kudus. A double whammy for me as Gary collected 16 points from the game, being a fan of the club also he would have been relieved they got an own from Jan Paul van Hecke to salvage a point. So now my captain Salah had already been neutralised as he was not amongst the bonus points. Nottingham Forest took an early lead at Burnley, I hoped it was Chris Wood, only for it to be a belter from Neco Williams. Jaidon Anthony (£5.5m) scored yet again to square things up and I may have to add the former Bournemouth man to my watchlist as he also grabbed his third goal.  

West Ham’s woes continued as they fell 2-1 at home to Crystal Palace in the Derby. Jarrod Bowen at least got a goal for me although it was just mere consolation for the Hammers. I was pleased to see that Bowen was top of the bonus points system, ironically Bowen’s goal took away Daniel Munoz’s clean sheet points. Leeds ran riot in the first half at Wolves as they won 3-1. I started Joe Rodon so of course there was no clean sheet for Daniel Farke’s men this time around, they only have a shutout when I bench him.

I dislike Manchester United with a passion, but they actually did me a favour in the 5.30pm kick-off. Robert Sanchez was sent off after just five minutes and the Red Devils went on to win 2-1, despite having Casemiro dismissed in the second period. The blanks from Enzo Fernandez and Joao Pedro were much appreciated. The 8pm contest saw Brentford travel to Fulham. Things started quite well as the Bees took the lead and Caoimhin Kelleher had made a couple of saves. The Cottagers then sprang into action and scored two goals in three minutes before half-time. I was fuming to say the least as it ended 3-1. Saturday concluded with me ahead by a single point, 27-26.     

With Dorde Petrovic being Gary’s keeper, I needed Sunday to start with Newcastle at least grabbing a goal at Bournemouth. Instead, in a very quiet game compared to what we anticipated, it ended goalless. Now usually, I would say I was very disappointed with Semenyo’s blank, with the new rules however, his defensive contributions got him two extra points meaning he got five points. Last season that would only have been three, a useful example of how much defensive contributions can make with attacking players. Still, I needed more from him as he was a differential here. Simultaneously, Sunderland, were at home to Aston Villa and I had high hopes that Ollie Watkins was finally going to get off the mark, only for him to disappoint again. Unai Emery’s men did score their first league goal of the campaign after Reinildo Mandava was sent off, through a Matty Cash thunderbolt that the keeper should have done better with. Mandava was in Gary's team, so him losing points gave me small hope at the time. The 10 men got an equaliser to my dismay from Wilson Isidor who despite only starting two out of the Black Cats’ opening games he is the joint-2^nd top scorer in the league being another man on three goals. No Ezri Konsa clean sheet hit hard as that would have surely taken me to victory. Watkins could have won it for Villa at the death but he could not get anything on a good ball into the box.

I now had a slender six-point lead however, I had no players left for the biggest game of the weekend between Arsenal and Manchester City, whilst Gary had Erling Haaland, yeah …you know what is coming next people. Pep Guardiola’s men took the lead with a slick counter attack that was of course finished off by Haaland. When it got to the hour mark, we were then level. City piled men behind the ball and almost got all three points before Gabriel Martinelli’s injury-time lob made sure the Gunners got a share of the spoils. I was praying I could get a draw, unfortunately despite the Arsenal goal, Haaland still got maximum bonus points meaning Gary prevailed in a low scoring contest, 39-36.

I felt sick! This has merely been how my luck has been this season. I lost to a man who had a player sent off losing him two points and I still was defeated. I suppose this week it could have been worse as Tijani Reijnders assisted Haaland’s goal and Gary left him on his bench. I have never suffered five straight defeats since being in any head-to-head league and I must conjure up a plan of how to make my fortune change. This is honestly terrible. Gary now leads the ‘Justice League’ as he is the only person with an 100% record as Darren B. lost his first game to Andrew.

@DubulDee